


Everywhere I Look (I catch a glimpse of you)

by chaoticlywise



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Author is not a doctor, Fluff, Gen, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, Hurt Peter Parker, Hurt/Comfort, Parent Tony Stark, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Precious Peter Parker, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Has Issues, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-24
Updated: 2018-08-24
Packaged: 2019-07-02 02:53:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15787476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chaoticlywise/pseuds/chaoticlywise
Summary: “I wanna start living rather than just existing, you know?” Peter said, absentmindedly petting the cat in his lap but looking Tony dead in the eyes with his watery ones. Nobody should be able to look that broken.Or:The Avengers bring the other half the universe back from the snap. Peter tries to readjust with the help of Tony, his aunt, the team, and a cat named Oliver.





	Everywhere I Look (I catch a glimpse of you)

**Author's Note:**

> I wasn’t really sure where this fic was gonna take me, all I knew is I wanted a fic where Peter was struggling after coming back from the snap and Tony helps Peter cope. And I wanted a cat to be involved.  
> This is basically “lets follow peter through a year in his life” and it’s completely self-indulgent, like most of my fics are and will be unless I find a prompt I really like.  
> Knowing MCU Peter, he would most definitely name his cat after an animated one from a movie (Oliver & Company). Also, Peter is 16, and in June (yes, I do know his birthday is actually on August 27th thank you very much, but this just has to work with the story), he will turn 17 (so like in 5.5 months-ish since it’s November in this start of this fic).  
> Title from song: “Trouble” by Cage The Elephant.

i.)

Ever since Peter came back from Thano’s snap, nothing was the same. Everything felt twisted on it’s axis and warped, like his head wasn’t on straight. 

Peter was more than grateful when he first got back, to Tony, the Avengers, the few Guardians of the Galaxy that were left. But it was like he was just trying to be a person again. The person that went into the soul stone wasn’t the same as the person who came out.

It felt like Peter was constantly tired and as much as he knew it would help to be around the people he loved, all he wanted go to was take a nap. Everything that was simple before felt like it took ten times more effort now. Hell, getting out of bed was a task to be celebrated. ‘Small victories,’ Tony would say.

It had only been a couple of week since the reversal of it all. They were all nursing wounds and Peter wished his was physical. Something he could see with his own two eyes and use his enhanced healing to take care of it. It wasn’t. Because of course his wasn’t. Just more shit to pile on the already copious amounts of trauma that was already there. 

Peter wasn’t sure what happened to the stones. Tony had said something about Strange and Thor taking care of it. Peter didn’t really care so long as there weren’t anymore life threatening events for the next million years. They deserved a break, didn’t they? 

Peter and May had been staying at the Compound with the rest of the heroes that were still on planet. Even Strange was there more often than not. Nobody minded, of course. More people the better. More people to remind them all that they’d been through the same trauma and wouldn’t have to go through it again. Hopefully. 

May had already gone back to work in Queens as a nurse in a hospital. It was constantly busy. Bruce and Cho were taking care of the team's needs and checkups. Strange would help here and there but he was mostly at the Sanctum and helping with cleanup there with Wong. 

All Peter knew is that he was tired. 

——————————————————————

ii.)

Peter sighed as he looked out the window of the Compound in his room. He used to love the Compound. It was quiet here and and his senses were less disrupted by the constant noise New York provided whether that was cars honking, his neighbors going at it or anything in between. Now it was just dull and he wished he could go lay down in his uncomfortable bed in Queens where he could feel every spring poking his back. Not that he didn’t appreciate everything Tony had done for him and still continued to do, but the bed was too soft. He would normally opt to sleep on the couch that Tony had recently put in his room instead. 

He was sitting at his desk that overlooked the lake near the Compound for a little less than an hour, trying to do homework that had been due before… everything happened. It was raining softly and it was only 6 in the evening but it was quite dark out due to oncoming thunderstorms. So far, it was too quiet today. He sighed again and closed his calc book in favor of resting his cheek on his palm. He glared out into the world. 

Something near the lake moved. It was tiny and and orange and furry looking. It both piqued Peter’s interest and set him on edge. He cocked his head to the side slightly and squinted, trying to get a better look at whatever it was. He then realized it was a cat, struggling to crawl out of the lake. Peter pushed his chair back so fast and sudden, it scraped against the floor and fell backwards with a loud ‘thud’. Peter grabbed his jacket from off his bed and raced to his door in a dead sprint. 

Once he got out into the hall, he kept up his sprint all the way to the conjoined kitchen/living room area. Steve, Tony, Natasha, Bruce, Rhodey and Strange are all in the living room. They’re all dressed in comfortable looking clothing, even Strange. They all look up at his abrupt arrival. 

“Peter!” Bruce exclaimed while the rest of them recovered from the slight shock seeing Peter so suddenly had put them in. “We thought you were asleep.” 

Peter ignored him in favor of running to the sliding glass door that led to the deck near the lake. Tony stood to follow Peter, worry etched onto his face and a question on the tip of his tongue. Rhodey was next up followed by the rest of the Avengers in the living room.

By the time they all get out onto the deck, Peter is already halfway across the yard and Tony is running after him.

Peter can hear the splashing from his feet stomping into the puddles and his teammates calling out for him but he’s entirely too focused on finding the ball of wet fluff. 

Peter skids to a stop on his knees and looks around almost frantically. At this point, he can hear that Tony and Rhodey making their way to him. He’s gasping in frantic breaths and he’s not sure why other than he has to save this cat. 

He finally spots it, just a little ways into the lake, doing what can just barely be considered swimming, and he stumbles to his feet and wades a little into the water and scoops it up. He takes his jacket off leaving him in just his socks, sweatpants and his ‘how do you organize a space party? You planet’ tee-shirt and wraps the cat up in it. And now that he’s holding it, he notices it’s not a cat at all but a kitten.

A warm hand lands on his shoulder and turns him around. Tony is standing there, the bottom half of the bleeding edge armor already on and Tony’s gaze is intense. He doesn’t even realize Peter’s holding anything, too worried by what the fuck just happened to make his non-responsive kid run out to the lake in seconds. 

“What the hell, kid? Jesus, it’s freezing out here, what are you thinking? You’ll catch a cold.” It isn’t until the kitten mewls that Tony looks down. 

It is a sight to behold. Peter standing in the lake, absolutely drenched from rain and lake water, holding a small, upset kitten. A sight indeed. 

Peter looks at Tony for another minute, both of them still standing in the lake and over the sound of his worried teammates and, now, heavy rain asks one question. “Can we go inside?” 

Tony almost laughs at the absurdity of the situation. He nods instead and gently puts and hand on the small of Peter’s back and leads him back to the Compound. Rhodey meets them halfway and actually does laugh loudly at what he sees. 

“And what, do you suppose, are we gonna do with this?” Rhodey asks Peter. He shrugs but it’s clear from the way he tightens his arms around the shivering kitten what he wants. 

Once they get up to the deck, most of the Avengers are out there. They all have soft smiles at what they see. 

They stand under the overhang of the deck for a minute before Peter basically shouts over the now pouring rain. “Hi!” He’s drenched and his hair is curling softly due to the rain but he’s smiling harder than he has in weeks.

——————————————————————

iii.)

By the time they get inside, Peter is shivering harder than the cat. Thanks to his spidery side, Peter has a harder time in cool weather. Tony sends him off to go take a hot shower and put on warm clothes. Tony takes the cat when Peter gives it to him and he feels completely out of his element.

It’s Natasha who speaks up first. “So what are we gonna do with it?” She asked. 

“I don’t know,” Tony says. “It’s pretty clear Peter wants to keep it but I don’t know what his aunt will say.” He sighs deeply and then he sits down heavily in one of the kitchen chairs. 

Bruce shifts a little and adjusts his glasses. “Tony, I have no idea where you stand on if you wanna keep this cat or not, but it actually might really help Peter.” Tony nodded for him to continue but he didn’t look up from the cat. He scratched behind its ears gently and it started to purr. Steve walked into the kitchen to grab something. “Some animals can be considered ESA’s, or emotional support animals.”

Strange looks up at Bruce. “And Peter hasn’t wanted to do much of anything since…” he tapered off, but everyone knew what he was going to say. “Until he saw this cat.” He said instead. “And Bruce is right, about ESA’s. Cats give attention when they want it. It could be helpful to Peter’s state of mind, Tony.” 

“And along with that,” Bruce cuts in. “Cats are usually calmer than dogs and when they purr, it’s to show that they are happy or to calm themselves and other living beings around it down.” He said. Steve came back out with a bowl of warm milk and put it on the floor. Tony sat the cat on the floor when it started to struggle to get to the milk. As soon as it was on the floor, it made a beeline to the milk. 

Bruce began talking again. “Tony, this isn’t something you have to decide today. But seriously think about it, okay? If Peter seems more like his old self around the cat, maybe you should think about keeping it.” Tony nodded. 

“What am I supposed to tell May? ‘Hey you’re nephew found this cat and two doctors are saying it could be helpful for him! Let’s keep it,’.” Tony said with a slight scoff. 

“Tell her the truth, Tony.” Steve spoke up. “She deserves to know any possible way that she can try to understand Peter and his trauma. And maybe Peter’s still here physically but we lost some of him after the war.” 

As he was most of the time, and as much as Tony loathed to admit it, Steve was right. They had lost Peter in the soul stone and this Peter wouldn’t open up about what happened. A shell of his old self. The closest they’d gotten in weeks was that one happy smile and ‘hi!’ when he was holding the kitten on the deck. They needed to figure something out and quick if they wanted their old Peter back. And this little fluff of orange might be the answer.

——————————————————————

iv.)

Peter had come back into the room just minutes after the conversation. Most of the Avengers dispersed after so when Peter walked in, it was just Tony. The kitten was done with the milk and almost completely dry by then.

“Hi.” Peter said to Tony - and also maybe to the kitten - as he sat down in front of the cat.

“Hey there, kiddo.” Tony said back easily. “How’d you even see that fluff ball from all the way in your room?” Tony asked. He already knew the answer but he didn’t know how long Peter would be up and willing to talk, so Tony was going to milk this for all it’s worth.

“Enhanced senses, c’mon you know this Mr. Stark. Or are you forgetting it in your old age?” Peter teased. Tony gasps dramatically and holds a hand over his heart.

“I’m wounded, Parker. How could you.” Tony said with mock betrayal. Peter laughed at little. Maybe Tony was getting through to him. They sat in their respective places for the next couple of minutes, Peter happy to pet the cat and Tony not wanting to ruin the moment. It was Peter who broke the soft silence that had settled over them. 

“Mr. Stark, can we watch a movie? Or something? I don’t wanna go to my room yet.” He said and Tony nodded enthusiastically. 

“Yeah! Which one do you wanna watch? Star Wars?” Peter flinched. Okay, so maybe not Star Wars. Tony would ask about that later. “Uh, how bout Jurassic Park? Or maybe something a little more classic like, I dunno, Stand By Me?” He asked. 

“Um, I’ve never seen Stand By Me.” Peter admitted and Tony was more than a little shocked.

“Are you saying,” Tony began, voice sounding astonished. “I’ve seen a movie that you haven’t?” Peter groaned and dragged a hand through his hair.

“Oh my god, Tony. It’s been on my bucket list for movies to watch but I haven’t gotten to it.”

“No, no! You can’t take it back now.” Tony said in a smug voice. “This is the only movie I’ve seen that you haven’t.”

“You’re never going to drop this, are you?” Peter asked with his nose all scrunched up. It was pretty adorable. 

“Never,” Tony said. “Alright, let’s go make some popcorn, I can get FRI to get the team down here, in fact-” Peter cuts Tony off. 

“No!” He yells, startling both the kitten in his lap and Tony. “I mean, no, that’s okay.”

“O-kay?” Tony asks confusedly. “No to the popcorn or..?” 

“I just-” Peter cuts himself off with a frustrated sigh. “I was hoping just you and me could watch the movie?” He asked timidly and Tony is pretty sure his heart grew about 3 sizes. “You know what? Just forget about it.” Peter goes to stand up, still holding the kitten, but Tony interrupts.

“Nope, it’s fine kid. You wanna watch the movie with just me? Fine, that’s fine. Perfectly fine. I prefer it that way, actually. More perfect than Roger’s teeth-” 

“Tony,” Peter said in an almost whiny voice and Tony’s head snapped up to look at him, with his mouth hanging wide open. “I’ll get the movie started up if you can make the popcorn?” He asked. Tony was still in shock but he nodded. 

They both went to do their jobs and while Tony was waiting for the popcorn, he just watched Peter talk to FRIDAY and get the movie started and then cuddle into the couch with a huge blanket and the kitten snuggled up to him on his lap. That combined with the couch that could fit half the Avengers on it made Peter look like a kid for once. All Tony could think was how did he, probably one of the most undeserving people in the entire world, get so lucky with this kid? But with the way his life was going right now? He didn’t care, as long as it stayed this way.

Once the popcorn was ready, Tony dumped the pouch into a big plastic bowl (that was Spider-Man themed, it was a gift from Rhodey for his birthday after the fallout with Cap) and went over to the couch. “Scoot, spiderbaby, I’m an old man, I need the blanket for warmth, too.” Tony said as he tried to not sit on Peter or the kitten. 

By the time the kids in the movie were walking along the first railroad, Peter’s eyes were closing and his breathing was evening out. 

And if Peter fell asleep halfway through the movie, his head lolled to the side so it was resting on Tony’s shoulder and all Tony did was adjust so his arm was around Peter’s shoulders, it’s not like FRIDAY was gonna tell anyone.

——————————————————————

v.)

Early the next morning, Tony wakes up and shifts a little. His eyes fly open in panic when Peter isn’t right next to him. After the snap, Tony was having a hard time letting Peter go anywhere out of his sights for longer than an hour, scared that he would leave him too long and Peter would be gone the next time Tony went to check on him. Or if Tony and Peter fell asleep on the couch right next to each other, Peter would gone when he woke up.

Tony pushes the blankets off of him and stands up in record time. There’s a startled noise from behind him and he turns to face the kitchen, where the noise came from. Rhodey and Pepper are standing there, looking worried as hell and this isn’t right. They only looked at him like that when Peter was gone and Tony had a full mental breakdown that lasted a good four days before Pepper dragged him out of his hyper focus in the lab to get Peter (and everyone else) back. 

“Hey, Tones.” Rhodey says and his voice is soft and worried and sad. “Nightmare?” He asks, he sounds too sweet. ‘Something is wrong. Something is so, so wrong.’ Tony’s mind supplies.

“Where’s Peter?” He asked loudly, only stumbling over his words a little. “Where the hell did he go?” He almost yelled. Pepper flinches a little at the volume and he instantly feels bad for scaring her, but right now he’s too focused on the pure panic coursing through him. He would make it up to her later, starting with apologizing and ending with dinner or something else nice. Rhodey puts his hands up in a placating manner. 

“Tony, it’s alright,” Pepper says, and Tony’s eyes flick to her and he calms a little. “He’s just outside, he wanted to take a look around to see if he could find Oliver’s collar.” 

Tony sighs and almost collapses, feeling giddy with relief flooding his body. “First of all, it’s-” he whips out his phone. “7:23 in the morning, so it’s cold and still a little dark out, did he even wear a sweater or jacket or anything?” He asks and Pepper and Rhodey give each other this knowing look that really pisses Tony off for some unknown reason. “And second, who the hell is Oliver?” Pepper takes a long sip from her coffee (that Tony just now realizes she’s holding, when did she even get that?) and Rhodey smirks a little, the kind of smirk that only happens when Tony was about to regret and/or do something stupid. He hadn’t seen that smirk since before the fallout with Cap.

“Oh, didn’t you know?” Rhodey asked with a shit-eating grin on his face. “Peter called his aunt and asked if he could keep the cat after Bruce searched Ollie for a chip. May said yes, by the way.” 

“Okay, so let me get this straight. While I was knocked out on the couch, the kid had Bruce, what? Scan the cat for a tracking chip? And Bruce didn’t find anything?” Rhodey and Pepper nod. “Then he named the cat. And named it Oliver? What a lame name.” 

Pepper rolls her eyes at him. “It’s not lame, Tony. It’s named after the cat Oliver. You know, from Oliver and Company?” She asked. He just stares at her for a minute. This was too much information for his sleep addled mind too process, not to mention the fact that of fucking course, Peter named the cat he wanted to keep after a cat from a Disney movie. Tony scoffs and shakes his head fondly, ‘it’s such a Peter move.’ 

“So you said he was outside looking for proof that the cat didn’t belong to anyone, right?” He receives nods from Rhodey and Pepper. Tony walks over to the sliding glass door, and sure enough, there Peter is, nearing the lake and sifting through sunset colored leaves with his feet. “Okay, I’m gonna go help him look.” He grabs a thick AC/DC hoodie and slips it on and grabs one of his old MIT sweatshirts from the back of one of the kitchen table chairs. “We’ll be back soon. Oh, and Sugar-Bear?” Tony asks and Rhodey raises his eyes to Tony’s lazily, mug of coffee to his mouth, definitely not expecting Tony to call him by his old nickname. Rhodey raises his eyebrow to say ‘continue’. Tony smirks a little. “Would you be a dear and make me and the kid out there some hot chocolate or something?” He asks. Rhodey sips his coffee and pretends to contemplate it. 

He sighs. “Fine, Shnookums, I see all I am to you is a personal maid.” He says fighting a grin and Pepper is choking down laughter. 

“No dear,” Tony says as he heads out. “I’ve got FRI for that, don’t I FRIDAY?” 

She sounds highly amused when she answers. “Yes, boss.” Tony gives Rhodey a look that says ‘see?’ before heading out into the fall chill.

Tony knows Peter can hear him walking towards him but Tony purposely lets his feet fall heavier than normal as not to scare him. Even then, he calls out when he’s still a good couple of feet away. 

“Hiya, spiderbaby,” he says and Peter doesn’t turn around when he answers with a little mumble back. “Whoa, kid, grumpy much? You need a nap? ‘Cause you sure sound like you need one.” He teases. Peter huffs out a laugh and turns around. 

“Here,” Tony says, holding out the MIT sweatshirt. Peter looks at it for a second before taking it and putting on the extra layer. He shivers significantly less and only then does the knot in Tony’s stomach from the moment he woke up and found Peter gone begin to loosen.

“Also! You left me by myself on the couch, asleep no less, where anyone from the team could come in and see me like that? For shame, Parker. For shame. Do you know how much teasing would have gone on if Rogers- no if Wilson found me like that? I would never live it down!” He gestures wildly.

“My spider-sense would have felt if anything was gonna happen to you if I didn’t hear it first, it was fine.” There’s a little too much sincerity in his voice and it makes Tony feel a light of protectiveness flare in his gut in a way only Peter could make happen. “Plus, you looked like you needed the sleep.” He says almost to himself.

“Rude, I get enough sleep every night. I am a model citizen-” Peter snorts at that. “No, really, I am!” Tony tries to defend himself but Peter just shakes his head with a soft smile on his face as he begins pushing the dead leaves aside to look for the collar. Tony tapers off as soon as he realizes Peter’s not really listening anymore and decides to help look instead. 

“Is it a bad thing that I hope we can’t find Ollie’s collar?” Peter asks suddenly. Tony wants to say something cheesy like ‘nothing you ever do is bad, kiddo.’ but he refrains. For now.

“Nah, you’re too good of a person for it to be a bad thing. And if we do end up finding the owner, I’ll get you another cat.” Tony says easily and is rewarded with one of Peter’s toothy grins.

“Thanks, Mr. Stark.”

“No problem, kid.” Tony shrugs. Peter shivers violently, his teeth practically chattering. “Okie dokie, what do you say we head inside, huh?” He asks, but he doesn’t wait for an answer since he knows it would be a protest, and instead puts his hand on the small of Peter’s back like normal and they head inside. “Where’d you leave that cat anyway? I swear Peter, if it’s just almost 8AM and you already lost it.” He trails off, leaving the empty threat hanging in the air. 

“He’s in my room. Honestly Mr. Stark, I’m responsible. I’m about to be 17.” Peter says as he grabs the sliding door and opens it. Tony shudders dramatically and says ‘ew’ loudly. Pepper is standing in the kitchen and Tony notices that Rhodey, who he asked to make the hot chocolate, is gone. 

“Hey, where’s Rhodes?” Tony asks. Pepper hands Tony and Peter their hot drinks and she sighs.

“Ross called again,” she said in the voice that she normally used when she was talking to Tony or talking about Ross. Tony’s eyes narrow. “He wants to know what’s happening with the other Avengers since the Accords have yet to be taken down.” Tony sighs and runs a hand though his already messy hair. Peter looks a little nervous as he sips his drink but listens to the conversation anyway.

“Jesus, can’t he give us like, two seconds to recover? We saved the universe and this guys ass. If it weren't for us, there wouldn’t be any Accords to debate! He should be spending time with his family like normal people are doing, not haranguing us. He could at least give us some time before he throws Cap and co. back into the Raft. Honestly.” Tony rants. Pepper nods in her agreement while Peter takes a seat on the couch where he and Tony slept the night before. 

“Will I have to sign?” Peter says hesitantly. “Because if I have to sign, then that means I have to tell the world my identity. I don’t think I’m ready for that, Tony.”

“Don’t worry ‘bout it, Pete. Since you’re a kid, you legally can’t sign it. Not for a year and a half yet and Rhodey and I are trying to get the Accords taken down. In fact, I heard from a certain Wakandan king that Wakanda is the first of all 117 countries planning on stepping out of the Accords. And Rhodey has some connections in Europe and he was told France and Spain were on the brink of stepping out,” Tony explained. “After that, I’m sure a lot of other countries will start to sway in their votes. Don’t worry, kiddo, Spider-Man nor Peter Parker will have to sign. And even if it isn’t taken down, you know Pep, Rhodey, and I would step up to make sure you wouldn’t have to. And sheesh, your aunt is a force to be reckoned with when she’s mad. So, moral of the story is we’ll protect you if it comes down to it. ” he finished, ruffling Peter’s hair. Peter nodded, reassured. Tony would protect him. 

“He’s right, Peter. The rest of the Avengers would make sure you’re safe, too.” Pepper said, walking closer to the couch and sitting next to him. Peter liked Pepper. She was nice and understanding and he thought she would make a good mom. Like May but different, somehow. She put her arms around Peter’s thin frame and she cards her fingers through his hair and he leans into the touch.

Tony looks over at his makeshift family and feels warmth and pride and so much love. Not that he would ever admit it in those words. Except to maybe Pepper. Alone. When everyone was away from the Compound or asleep. 

“Okay, move over. I feel very left out right now.” Tony said, trying to come off as nonchalant but failing as he sat on Peter’s other side and threw his arms around Peter’s shoulders, hand resting on Pepper’s shoulder, furthest from him. There's a soft patting noise coming from down the halls to the bedrooms and Oliver the cat jumps up on the arm of the chair closest to Tony. He purrs loudly.

——————————————————————

vi.)

Over the next few days, Tony and Peter go out to look for cat supplies for Oliver. Tony will never tell anybody this, especially not to Peter, but he loves the cat. Although sometimes, it will follow Peter into the lab while Tony or Bruce is working and just stare at them while they do whatever they were doing that day. So, that was kind of weird. Tony looked it up and it just said that the cat found whatever you were doing interesting to them. Tony thinks it’s total bull but Peter loves him though, so Tony thinks it’s all worth it. 

Everything Peter did in the Compound, you could bet the cat wasn’t too far behind. Cooking, sleeping, reading, team movie night. You name it, the kid and the cat were there. The team had taken to having another small creature that needed to be protected at all costs around (no one would tell him, but Peter was the other small creature that needed to be protected at all costs). 

A couple of weeks later, schools in New York were opening back up, which meant that Peter would be moving back to Queens. They decided it was best if Oliver went with Peter since he was helping him so much.

And the cat really was helping Peter, too, now that they knew each other a little better. He started talking to Sam about his experience in the soul stone and he was going to therapy. Peter had even been the one to express his thoughts about wanting to go to therapy in the first place and May and Tony were happy to help him find a therapist that would work well with him. It happens to be Tony’s therapist. She had sworn not to tell anyone about Peter’s nightly activities that weren’t actually so nightly anymore. More like a ‘whenever he can get out of the apartment’ sort of thing. 

In complete honestly, Tony couldn’t say he wasn’t unhappy with how little Peter was going out as Spider-Man. They all needed breaks. Sometimes, however, if Tony just so happens to be in Queens while the crime fighting spider was out, then sometimes they would team up. This was when Old Peter would come back full force. Although Old Peter had been making small reaperances every once in awhile, it wasn’t as full fledged as when he was Spider-Manning. 

Peter came over a few times each week, Tuesdays and Fridays and occasionally, he would stay over for the weekend. Nobody minded when he came over and nothing was said when Oliver would make an appearance as well. But that was mostly just when Peter was staying over.

Tony and Peter had become even closer since he started talking about his time in the soul stone. He would even talk about it to Tony, and Tony felt so relieved. He was finally getting his kid back. This was a different feeling, getting him back this time from when he was a victim to Thanos’ wrath.

And then life really started to pick up again. School was giving tests and too much homework, petty crimes in Queens was becoming more and more often and more intense. 

And Peter was closing in on himself again and falling behind. 

He was becoming more active in his duties a Spider-Man, but he was taking more risks, putting himself in unnecessary danger, letting himself fall just too long to be comfortable before catching himself at the very last second. He didn’t go to therapy as much anymore. He would say he was busy instead of coming over to the Compound. It hurt more than him getting dusted. Because now, Peter was here. He was on Earth and he was alive and breathing. But he was giving everyone the cold shoulder. Snapping quickly at small things Strange would say or at something Natasha would do during training. He even raised his voice once at May, but he apologized as soon as he did. None of the Avengers would admit it but it was complete anguish to have to see the kid in clear agony and pushing everyone away.

Both Strange and Bruce tell Tony he should try to spend some one-on-one time together since he was the only one Peter had yet to snap at yet. Tony will do anything that might help, so he takes their advice.

Peter comes over to the penthouse Tony bought in Midtown when Peter had gone back to Queens after Thanos. It’s just Tony and Peter and New York here. No lab or training room or anything. Peter seems relaxed but he hardly speaks. 

“So, kid, what’cha wanna do? We got the whole penthouse to ourselves. No Pepper to tell us we can’t jump on the beds or May to tell us not to stay up until the ass-crack of dawn playing Mario Kart. What’s first?” Tony asks Peter, who just shrugs his backpack off onto the couch in response and slumps down next to it. Happy had just picked him up from school and he had texted Tony while Peter was on his way up in the elevator and said that he didn’t talk the entire ride here. Tony sighed deeply. He didn't want to interrogate the kid but he was really leaving him with no other choice. “

“Okay, Peter, listen up,” he says and Peter raises a surprised brow. Tony goes to sit down next to him on the couch, the backpack is a wall in between them and he has never felt further away from Peter. Never so out of his element. God, he hoped this didn’t come off like how it would’ve if his father said it to him. “Listen,” he says again, not really sure how to start this conversation. Peter sits up and shifts uncomfortably and it makes Tony want to say ‘just forget it, what do you want to eat’ or something. He stands his ground. “Peter, you can’t keep doing… this.” He begins. Peter’s eyes narrow.

“Keep doing what?” Peter asks and it’s soft but there’s an almost dangerous lilt to his tone.

“You can’t keep pushing us away, Pete. You have to talk to us or we can’t help you.“ Tony says and once Tony starts, he can’t stop. He’s on a roll. “I know you’re putting yourself in more danger than normal and you’re getting hurt worse because of it.” Something Rhodey said to him a while back pops into his head. “You want to do this whole lone gunslinger act, Pete, and it’s unnecessary. Just let us in.” Tony says, resting a hand over Peter’s. 

Peter is looking down at the floor and his lip is quivering but he doesn’t shake off Tony’s hand like expected. Tony ducks his head to try and gauge a reaction or to get Peter to look at him but nothing happens. Finally, Peter looks up and Tony gets his first real, good look at Peter and he almost gasps but holds it in for Peter’s sake. And Peter looks bad. Worse than bad. His eyes are tearing up and there are dark bags around both of his eyes that Tony didn’t see in the dim lighting before. He has a healing split lip and he looks too young. A sob tears it’s way out of Peter’s throat before he can stop it and he covers his mouth with both hands trying and failing to muffle the rest that come after. Tony picks up the backpack and puts it on the ground in front of them. He then gently, hesitantly, slides over to Peter and wraps his arms around him. Peter reacts instantly, wrapping his arms back around Tony and finally letting the sobs tear through him.

——————————————————————

vii.)

Peter is going back to therapy now. The anger and grief that was consuming him before left all at once and now, he just felt numb. Like how he did directly after Ben. The therapist said that it took him a bit to realize that his life was different now and going back to school must have been what snapped him back into reality. “You’re… mourning your past self,” she has said. Peter knew he could never be the same after he came back and he was going through the stages you would go through after losing a loved one. But Peter couldn’t get his old life back. He couldn’t mourn and then go back to normal because it was ripped away from him in one fell swoop. Peter would have to find his normal again, and it would take a while but with the help of family and close friends, he would get there.

Peter is over to the Compound on a Friday night in late December after much persuading from Tony, May, Pepper and even Rhodey. He was planning on staying the night, so Oliver had come along as well.

Peter has promised that he would help Tony work on a new Spider-Man suit that night after dinner but soon, it’s an hour after dinner. Then two. Tony is contemplating going to find Peter a half an hour later when Oliver comes into the lab unaccompanied. In all honesty, he doesn’t even notice the cat at first, music too loud and working on the Bleeding Edge armor. At first, he just assumed it was Peter and he called out to him.

“Hey, Pete. So you’re a little late so I hope you don’t mind that I already started working.” There's no response but that doesn’t really worry him. Peter has been quiet and distant since he had his breakdown at the penthouse two and a half weeks ago. Sure, it wasn’t a good thing but it was becoming the normal in the past couple of weeks. He missed before-the-snap Peter, but he still loved this one, too. “Damn, kid, what’d I to deserve the silent treatment?”

It’s when there's no noise at all, no footsteps, no hum of affirmation like he had been doing recently, no snort at his attempted joke, no anything except a little patting of paws coming towards him and a loud, high-pitched meow that makes him turn around. It causes a feeling Tony can’t quite identify to twist and churn in his gut.

“Hey, Ollie,” he says as he steps over to the cat to scratch it behind his ears like Peter told him Ollie liked. The cat jerks his head of the way. He purrs urgently instead. Oliver then does something odd, something Tony never knew a cat to do. He turned and started walking to the doors of the lab before turning around and staring at Tony with what looks like it could be concern or knowing. Or something like ‘follow me’. He scoffs a little. “Christ, I cannot believe I’m going to do this.” He mutters under his breath. He follows the cat.

They wander what seems almost aimlessly until the cat brings Tony to the door that leads to the roof. The door is slightly ajar and warning signals go off in his head loudly. He checks his wrist to make sure he’s got the watch that can turn into a mini version of his Iron Man gauntlet. But then Oliver walks straight onto the roof without even a second glance. Tony isn’t sure what to think at this point, so he opens the door wider and sees a small figure sitting on the ledge of the roof, feet hanging down. Relief and panic settle into his bones simultaneously as he realizes who is sitting there.

It’s Peter, sans his suit or any form of protection, with his feet hanging over the ledge like a threat. Oliver makes his way over to Peter and meows loudly. Peter turns around, clearly not having seen Tony yet (or he’s choosing to ignore him), picks up Oliver and places him on his lap. Tony makes his feet fall heavier once again as he opens the door and walks towards the kid.

“Hey,” Tony says, standing a few feet behind him. Snow starts to fall softly, catching in Peter’s hair and dampening his clothes. “It’s pretty cold out here, huh? What do ya say we head inside and warm up? I bet I can make some hot chocolate. It won’t be nearly as good as Pep’s bu-” 

“That’s okay, Mr. Stark. I’m fine up here.” He says but his tone is flat and he only continues to stare out into the slowly darkening night.

“Okay,” Tony says as he goes to sit next to Peter who looks up at him. “I’ll stay here with you.” He trusts Peter, he really does but not when he’s sitting on the ledge of a building. They sit in the serene silence for a few minutes and then Peter speaks up.

“Thank you, Tony,” Peter says suddenly. “For everything you’ve done for me and May. For Spider-Man.” 

“Don’t sweat it kid.” Tony says, eyeing him wearily. “Are you okay? That’s a dumb question. But you know you can talk to me right? Everyone in this building cares about you so, so much Peter. You can talk to any of us.”

Peter looks up at him and begins talking but he’s still using that flat tone. “I wanna start living rather than just existing, you know?” Peter said, absentmindedly petting the cat in his lap but looking Tony dead in the eyes with his watery ones. Nobody should be able to look that broken. Tony wants to reach out and do something but he’s not sure if Peter would feel threatened by his sudden movements, whether they were hostile or not. So he sits and listens.

Peter looks away, back into the night. “I feel like I’m trapped in a cycle. I finally get comfortable in my own skin and then something happens. And takes that away. My parents. Ben. Me.” His voice cracks and more tears are spilling over his cheeks. “What am I doing wrong, Tony? What’s wrong with me?” He asks and he sounds desperate for someone to understand. 

Tony ends up leading Peter inside the Compound and they fall asleep on the same couch they did so many months ago with Oliver curled up by their feet. But this time, there's a different feel in the air. 

——————————————————————

viii.)

The Avengers were worried. Peter was lashing out less, sure, but after he started to go to therapy again, he was like a stranger in their home. He was a different person. Quieter and more subdued. 

They had gotten through Christmas without any problems Peter related. Spider-Man was going out less and people were starting to notice now that things were going back to normal. Whole articles in news papers were dedicated to the friendly neighborhood Spider-Man. If Peter did go out, he went with another Avenger accompanying him, as Tony and May’s orders with Peter’s consent. Normally, it was Tony who went with, occasionally Rhodey, Natasha or Clint. Even sometimes Sam. 

Steve never went. He and Tony may be on okay terms right now but that didn’t mean he trusted him with Peter. Tony still didn’t trust him with a lot of things. He was even hesitant to tell him that Peter was Spider-Man when they all first came back. Steve was brave and courageous but one thing he wasn’t was dumb. He would have found out sooner or later so Peter and Tony decided to tell the team on their own terms. The team had reacted the way Tony had when the found out he wasn’t even out of high school yet. Shocked, angry, betrayed. They were supposed to protect kids, not make them feel like they had to go out and handle things like Peter was on their own. 

But they’d grown to love Peter, just as Tony and Pepper and Rhodey did and now it was creeping up on Peter’s 17th birthday. 

Peter had given up on asking for nothing because there were protests from literally everyone, whether they said it outloud or not, but he specifically told them he didn’t want a big party or anything. ‘Maybe just a few friends over? And you guys?’ he had asked. They all knew Tony had been planning on throwing him a huge party but stepped back and let the others help so it wouldn’t turn into anything that would overwhelm Peter. They were going to have it a week before his actual birthday since he always spent it with May and Ned, watching movies and eating cake. They respected that. 

They were finishing setting up for Peter’s party when FRIDAY alerts them that Peter is on his way up in the elevator with Happy. There were some deep blue and red streamers hanging down from the ceiling and a few similar colored balloons except the two large, golden 1 and 7 balloons in front of Sam and Nat’s homemade cake. Keeping with the theme, the cake had messy blue buttercream frosting on top of the deep red velvet cake. 

Tony had to remind himself that this is what Peter wanted and it was good. This was nothing like his 17th. His parents had said they’d be back the day just before his birthday and he had stayed up all night waiting for them. And when they didn’t show, he wasn’t even that upset. Instead, he invited a bunch of kids from MIT over to his dorm and partied and drank until he blacked out and woke up in the hospital a few days later. The only thing he remembered when he woke up was that his mom was sitting next to him and he could faintly hear Howard yelling at someone out in the hallway. He then promptly passed out. None of Peter’s birthdays would be like that, if Tony had any say. And none of them would be like that even if he didn’t because May would never in good conscience allow that.

And it sure as hell wasn’t going to happen today. The elevator door rang and the Avengers stood around the combined kitchen/living room area waiting in anticipation. As soon as Peter and Happy walked out, they all shouted ‘surprise!’ and Peter looked genuinely shocked for a minute. Then a smile broke out across his face. 

“Wow! This is great guys, thank you.” he said with sincerity. Everyone smiled brightly back at him. Tony approached him and slung an arm over his shoulders and led him into the living room. They all call him Mr. Parker instead of Peter, claiming he was too old to be called anything else, especially not any nicknames. That only lasted for the first couple of minutes before Steve slipped up and called him ‘Pete’. Tony had tensed beside him when Steve had said that but tried to make himself relax. Peter knew Tony still wasn’t completely comfortable around Steve, let alone Peter being around Steve. Peter threw him a reassuring look and it seemed to help because he finally relaxed completely. 

The night started with cake and Peter loved it, thanking Natasha and Sam extensively. Tony knew Nat wouldn’t admit it but they could tell she was smitten by Peter. Sam seemed extremely proud of his handiwork, citing it was his mom's recipe. Presents were next and Peter still seemed awed about everything. “It’s not everyday you can say the Avengers threw you your 17th birthday party.” Peter said, laughing a little while texting Ned.

Everyone had gotten him something nice. Strange had gotten him some books from his extensive library at the Sanctum. Natasha and Clint had gotten him a Russian pocket knife that Tony had immediately taken away and told Peter he could have it when he was at least 50 (he would scold the super spies later for getting a kid a weapon, whether or not he was Spider-Man). They had also gotten him some LEGOs and Peter blushed harder than the red in his suit. Sam and Steve had gotten him some comic books of various brands but they were mostly DC comics. Bruce had gotten him a couple of physics books that Peter was already fascinated by from the cover alone. Thor had given him some Asgardian manuscripts that he told Peter he would teach him how to read later. Rhodey, Pepper and Happy had gotten him an older jeep, with May’s consent (Tony had upgraded it to have features such as GPS and an AUX plugin. Tony had also put in some other more practical things like a button that would call Tony if he pressed it, roadside assistance, bulletproof windows, and new airbags). 

All those gifts were opened, Tony handed Peter his gift. Peter had actually teared up at the sight of it. The significance of the gift went right over everyone else's head but not Peter’s and certainly not Tony’s. It was a disk of Stand By Me. 

He stared at it with tears in his eyes and wetly said, “Thank you, Tony.” 

“No problem, kiddo.” 

The rest of the night was spent full of laughter, more cake than was healthy to eat, and Mario Kart. Clint and Rhodey were very competitive. Nearing the end of the night, around 1AM, Peter had put in Stand By Me and they all sat down and watched it until they fell asleep.

——————————————————————

ix.)

Going out as Spider-Man was thrilling. It was June 12th. The day after he turned 17. He decided as a gift to himself and New York, he would go out and help some people. 

It was almost 2AM and it had been a quiet night, not much had happened and he was about to go home and hit the hay when a scream rang through the air. He used his heightened hearing alone to travel to the noise all the while his brain was screaming at him that he was too late. ‘Like with Ben,’ he thought, only making him swing faster and clumsier towards the alleyway.

When he gets there, he sees the mugger and the woman. She wasn’t hurt, the knife was probably only out just to scare her. ‘Stereotypical,’ he thought, rolling his eyes. He dropped down into the alleyway.

“Hey, man.” Peter said, webbing the knife to the wall. “Don’t you know knives are dangerous?” He quipped. The man growled, and it almost sounded animalistic. The man pulls another knife out of his back pocket and lunges at Peter, who sidesteps the attack. “Are you kidding me? Two knives? What is with muggers.” He mutters and then turns around to the lady, who is still cowering in the corner. “Go!” Peter shouts to her. She doesn’t move from her spot, but deep sobs wracked her body. 

His spider-sense screams at him and he turns around to see the man running at him again. Peter grabs the man’s hand and pushes him back. He falls into a few trash cans and bags lining the wall and the knife falls out of his hand. Peter watches him for a few seconds to make sure he wasn’t going anywhere. He looks passed out and now that the adrenaline is seeping out of him, Peter can smell heavy alcohol on his breath. Peter goes to help the lady. He crouches in front of her and begins talking to her in soft tones.

“Ma’am,” he says. “You can’t stay here. I can call 911 for you?” He asked, as he offered his hand to her. She took it and helped her up. “Are you okay? Did he hurt you?” She shook her head.

“N-no, to both questions.” She brushed herself off and picked up her discarded purse. 

“Do you have somewhere you can go?” Peter asks. She nods her head. 

“I was headed to a friends house when…” She trails off as she gestures to where the man was. Peter hums an affirmation. 

“Okay, well-”

Suddenly, his spider-sense spiked and he turned around just in time to get a knife to his abdomen. He gasps and clutches his side. He looks down and sees the bloody knife protruding from his side. The man is smirking when he looks back up and the woman is gone. ‘Good, at least she’s safe,’ is all he can think. Peter falls to his knees and everything hurts. He can faintly hear Karen saying something. “-ter, you need to get out of here, now! I’m afraid this man still has hostile intentions.” 

The man pitches forward drunkenly and he pushes the knife further into Peter’s side. He cries out loudly and he realizes, flustered, how much he sounds like a child. But it fucking hurts and he can’t think. His body seems to start working on auto-pilot. His arms shoot out and hit the man square in the chest. He stumbles back and hits the wall. Peter webs his arms to the wall and he braces himself as he falls to the ground. 

“Peter, I’m under strict protocol to call Mr. Stark if you become unresponsive while hurt. If you don’t respond in a coherent way within the next 10 seconds, I am required to call Mr. Stark.” Karen says and she sounds more worried than an AI should be able to. It takes him five seconds to comprehend what she said but he can only grunt in response. “Calling Mr. Stark.” She says, sounding impassive now. He feels like he’s going to throw up. He needs to take his mask off. The phone is still ringing so he makes a split second decision. He manages to get up and web his way onto the room. 

The knife digs deeper into his side once he tumbles onto the roof and he gasps. His vision whites out and he sees stars. He gasps again and tries to sit up. He rips the knife out of his side and throws it somewhere on the roof and he tries to put pressure on the now heavily bleeding wound. There's a metallic taste in his mouth and its choking him. He tugs his mask off and turns onto his side. Bloody spit dribbles out of his mouth. This fucking sucked. 

The phone goes to voicemail and Karen responds instead of Mr. Stark. “The attempt made to reach Mr. Stark was unsuccessful. I’m attempting to get in contact with FRIDAY, who will then contact Mr. Stark. If he does not answer, the next person to call after is Colonel Rhodes. Is that alright, Peter?” Karen asks and now she really just sounds like a robot. Peter lets out a shaky breath. The comm in his ear that Karen is talking to him from is so loud. He lets out a garble of nonsense instead of saying something like ‘it’s okay, I can handle this myself.’ or something equally as dumb. But then, a thought hits him harder than the wearhouse falling on top of him.

If Mr. Stark doesn’t pick up, this might be where he dies. He forces the words out with pure will and terror alone

“C-call ‘im, Kar’n.” He fumbles. “Call Mr. St’rk.” 

“On it.” She says. And then she doesn’t say anything. But then he hears the most beautiful sound. The phone is ringing. He could almost cry with relief. Someone was going to come save him from this hell. Then the phone is being picked up.

“Peter?” A familiar voice asks. It’s Tony and he sounds exhausted. “What the hell are you still doing up? I know it’s summer but it’s definitely after curfew-” Peter lets out an unintentional sob and he can’t stop the tears once they start. “Are you okay? What happened?” Tony asks, he sounds more awake now and he can hear shuffling in the background. 

“To-ony,” Peter chokes around blood and spittle and tears. “I thin’ I nee’ help.” He manages to say. There's more shuffling over the line but this time it sounds more frantic. Then he hears the telltale sound of repulsors and the Iron Man suit booting up.

“Shit. How come Karen didn’t call?” Tony asks and it sounds rhetorical but Peter’s eyelids feel heavy with pain induced fatigue and that’s scarier than turning to dust. Peter knows if he dies, he won’t come back this time. So he answers Tony. 

“She did,” Peter says. “She called but she sai’ you didn’t pick up yo’r phone so she said she’d call FRIDAY instead. An’ you picked up the secon’ time, so s’ fine.” He slurs. Tony curses.

“Damn it, I’ll be there in 3 minutes, 20 seconds. You think you can keep talking to me until then?” Tony asks. His voice is sharp and urgent and it makes Peter panic for a minute but there's a soft, gentle tone under it all and it calms him.

“I dunno, Mr. St’rk,” He says truthfully. Even talking hurt now. “I’m really tired.” 

“Well, I need you to be not tired, okay? I hereby order you to not fall asleep. Okay, so now you can’t. I need you to stay with me.” Tony declares. “1 minute and 5 seconds, Pete. Stay with me.” Tony says and Peter thinks he must really be booking it or he’s losing track of time because now he hears the Iron Man suit from miles away. It gets progressively louder until Peter has to grit his teeth at the noise to keep from covering his ears.

“I can see you, Pete. I’m here.” Tony says and Peter feels the vibrations more than he sees Tony land on the roof from behind him. When did he close his eyes? 

Before he can contemplate that terrifying thought any longer, there’s a warm, calloused hand on the side of his face, steading him, and Peter leans into the momentary reprieve. “Hey, Pete. Not feelin’ too hot, are we? Can you open your eyes for me?” Tony asks. Peter grunts but he forces his eyes open anyway. Everything is blurry but he can make out Tony’s worried face above him. He smiles warmly at Peter, but there’s a crease in his brows. 

“There you are. Okay Peter, I need you to listen to me. Whatever was in your side isn’t there anymore so you’re bleeding pretty badly. I need to put pressure on it or you might pass out from blood loss, got it?” There’s pressure on his upper abdomen before he can respond and Peter cries out from the suddenness of it. Tony shushes him gently. “I know, I know. You’ll be okay, it’s okay.” He rambles. Peter takes it back, if everything before this hurt, this was fucking hell. 

He could feel every time the two flaps of skin brushed together, only making him cry harder. He faintly hears Tony talking to someone over the phone briefly but everything is fuzzy and there’s a weird, high pitched ringing in his ears. Tony leans over him, still pressing down but now he’s addressing Peter again. 

“I know it hurts, buddy, but Bruce and Doctor Cho will be here soon. You’ll be okay.” He says, his voice is soft and the last thing Peter remembers before passing out is that he should ask Tony to use that voice more if he makes it out of this.

——————————————————————

x.) 

Tony is panicking and this isn’t good. Peter, the kid he was supposed to protect with his life, was dying right in front of him. Bruce and Cho wouldn’t be here for another couple of minutes at most, but that was still too long. 

It was better when Peter was awake because then he could continue his mantra of ‘it’s okay’ and ‘you’ll be okay’. But when Peter passed out, there was nothing he could do to placate himself. He just pressed down on the wound harder.

He looks at Peter face and he’s too pale. There’s a crease between his brows and Tony gets the sudden parental ugre to smooth down. He has to look away before he gives into the feeling.

It feels like only seconds later when he hears the whirring of the quinjet, but he knows it had to have been longer than that. A hand is placed on his and he snarls as he looks up. It’s Bruce, and he looks worried and a little frightened. 

“Hey, Tony. it’s just me and Cho, we’re going to help if you back away.” Bruce says slowly and Tony is grateful for this because it still takes him too long to figure what the words mean. Tony just nods when he figures it out and moves back slightly. As soon as he does, Bruce, Cho and a few of her team members are over Peter, stabilizing him and putting pressure on his abdomen. Medical phrases a thrown around that Tony has no idea what they mean. His hearing is fuzzing out and he looks down at his hands. They’re covered in blood. Peter’s blood. 

“Shit, he has a punctured lung.” Someone says and Tony snaps back into action. He calls Rhodey.

“Tones? Man, it’s like 3 in the morning.” Rhodey yawns over the phone and Tony feels a twinge of guilt for waking his best friend. He needed his sleep. But the kid needed help.

“Rhodes, I need you to get Pepper and May and get to the Compound ASAP.” Tony says. There's shuffling on the other side of the phone and he distantly wonders if this is what Peter felt like when he called him. God, and he didn’t even pick up the first time, too absorbed in his work in the lab, the music too loud to hear the incessant buzzing.

“Tony, what happened?” Rhodey asks and he sounds more desperate this time. Tony realizes he probably already asked once and Tony was too caught up in his own self berating to notice. ‘Like you were when Peter called,’ His head supplies, unhelpfully. He pushes away the thought before it can fester and take over all his thoughts.

“Pete got hurt on patrol. Bad.” Tony says and the reality settles in as the doctors and nurses shuffle Peter onto a gurney. Peter might not make it out of this.

“Fuck, what are his injuries.” Rhodey demands. Bruce calls to Tony that they’re loading up and Tony is thankful for his foresight to keep the nanotech in. He would use it but one look at Peter on the gurney, looking so incredibly small and pale and cold, and changes his mind.

“He got stabbed in his side. Heard it punctured a lung.” Tony says in all one breath as he practically runs onto the jet. He moves to stand near the pilot's seat and it’s then that he realizes that Clint was the one flying. Clint looks back and offers him a reassuring smile. 

“Hey,” Clint says. “Trust me, I know how it feels to have a hurt kid.” And that hurts because he knew in some distant part of his brain, that he saw Peter as his kid. “Team’s worried about him, though. I’ve got them in my ear.” Clint says, getting ready to head out. “What do you know about him?” he asks.

“He got stabbed.” Tony says numbly. Rhodey is still talking to him, asking questions and reassuring him that Peter would be okay. Then Peter’s eyes flick wide open and he seizes. 

“He’s having a seizure!” Someone shouts and then there’s chaos. 

“Rhodes, I gotta go. I’ll see you at the Compound.” Tony says as he cuts off Rhodey’s protests. He rushes towards him and gets there in time for Peter to collapse to the table. 

“We need to get to the Compound as soon as possible, Clint!” Bruce shouts to the front of the Jet. Clint just nods and speeds up. They all sway a little but recover quickly, putting more cloth on the wound to staunch the blood flow. 

——————————————————————

xi.)

They get to the Compound in record time. The rest of Cho’s team is already waiting in the medbay when they rush him into surgery. 

It’s almost 4AM and Tony is exhausted. He collapses in one of the waiting room chairs and puts his head in his hands. “Tony?” he hears Rhodey approach him and there's the clicking of heals behind him that Tony associates with Pepper. One of Rhodey’s hands clamp around Tony’s shoulder and he looks up. Rhodey is still wearing PJ’s and he looks about as tired as Tony feels. “You okay, man?” He asks. Tony drops his head back into his hands and shakes his head. Rhodey sits next to him, hand still firmly on his shoulder and Pepper squats in front of him. She puts a gentle hand on his knee and ducks her head to try to get him to look at her. He keeps his eyes down.

“I was supposed to protect him.” Tony whispers brokenly. “He wasn’t supposed to get hurt again after…” he trails off. Rhodey and Pepper know what he was going to say anyway.

“Honey, this is in no way your fault,” Pepper says, moving her free hand up to cup his cheek. He leans into it. Just like Peter did into his. God, everything he thought about right now was just ‘PeterPeterPeter’. He almost wished it wasn’t. It hurt so bad that this was Peter. Not Cap, or Wanda, or Natasha, or Clint or him. Someone that could handle it. No, it had to be the kid. He had just turned 17.

“The best thing right now to think about right now is that Peter is learning, finally.” Rhodey says, squeezing his shoulder and smiling comfortingly. “He called you, Tones. He knew he needed help and that’s more than we can say for Old Peter, as much as we miss him.” 

“He’s right.” A deep voice says from the door at the end of the hall. Tony looks up. It’s Steve, Sam, Natasha, and Clint. One part of Tony doesn’t want the super soldier anywhere near the kid while he’s hurt and vulnerable like he is but the other part of him remembers a time when he trusted Steve so explicitly. Steve wouldn’t let the kid be anything other than okay at the end of this. He was the team leader. He had a demanding presence that said ‘do it my way or get out of it’. Tony knew it too, he had made the mistake of staying in the way. And now, Tony wasn’t so sure what Steve was anymore. “Peter will get through this. He’s one tough kid.” Steve goes for a warm smile but it looks more like a grimace. Peter would love to know that he had the Avengers waiting for him. Steve-shitting-Rogers waiting for him. Tony absolutely loathes the thought. 

“He’s the toughest kid I know.” Tony agrees. The Avengers at the door take this as the okay for them to come into the waiting room. Tony isn’t so sure how he feels about that. He turns to Pepper instead of saying anything to them. “Speaking of tough, where’s May? Does she know what’s happening here?” Pepper nods.

“Yeah, Happy went to go pick her up as soon as Rhodey called. They should just be another 30 minutes out now, give or take a little.” She says. Tony nods.

“Tony, why don’t you go get cleaned up.” Rhodey says. Tony gives him a questioning look and Rhodey sighs and gestures to his hands. He looks down and he can feel his heart stop beating in his chest. His hands are still covered in Peter’s blood, and he’s not sure why he thought they wouldn’t be anymore. The blood on his palms and the back of his hands are cool and dry and flaking off but the blood in between his fingers are still tacky, sticky and warm. Tony feels like he’s gonna throw up again.

“Excuse me,” He says, shooting up and out of his chair. He walks briskly down the hall to the closest bathroom. He doesn’t want anyone to see him fall apart like he already feels like he is.

Once he gets to the bathroom, he slams the door closed behind him and rushes to the sink. He turns on the faucet and watches the once clear water turn a red-pink liquid and flow down the drain. His hands still feel dirty even after minutes of washing them under hot water. 

There’s a soft knock on the door and Tony would deny at gunpoint that his voice wavered when he answered. Pepper’s voice comes through the door.

“Tony?” she asks softly. “FRIDAY said you were in here so I brought you some new clothes.” He doesn’t respond. He hears her sad sigh. “Okay, honey, I’m just going to leave them out here on the floor. Oh and Stephen Strange just got here. Rhodey called him, told him the situation. He just wants to be here for you and Peter.” She says. He walks to the door and flings it open, she’s standing out there, looking shocked at the abruptness of it. He pulls her into a hug and the clothes drop to the ground with a soft ‘plap’. She wraps her arms about his waist as a few tears fall onto her shoulder.

——————————————————————

xii.)

By the time Tony changes and heads back to the medbay, Peter is out of surgery. Bruce explains the extent of his injuries which consist of punctured lung, the obvious stab wound, blood loss, and the fact that he had one other seizure during surgery.

Once they put Peter in a room, Tony is immediately at his side. He isn’t awake yet and that’s okay. Peter needs to heal and if sleeping is the best and fastest way, then so be it.

May gets to the Compound another 15 minutes later and Tony feels ashamed that he’s sad to not have the room to just himself and Peter. She’s a whirlwind of emotions, panic and anger being the most prominent. 

“Where is he? Peter Parker?” She asks Sam frantically, who points to the room Tony and Peter are in. She thanks him hastily and walks into the room quickly. She sits on Peter’s other side and she doesn’t say anything to Tony. Maybe she’s the only other one who notices that this whole situation is his fault. She grasps Peter’s other hand, the one that Tony isn’t holding onto with a white knuckled grip, and squeezes his hand beifely. She looks up at Tony.

“Who did this?” She asks. Tony hadn’t even thought about that, too deep in the throes of pain and anger and pure, unadulterated terror. “Are they in jail? Are they at least in police custody?” Her stare is intense in a way he’s never been under before. He falters.

‘I’m- I have honest to god no clue, May.” Tony stutters and he almost rolls his eyes at himself, he’s never stuttered before, ever. That he can think of, at least. Her gaze hardens. “I’ll get someone on it, though.” He amends. He stands up and it’s harder than it should be to let go of Peter’s hand. He does so anyway, deciding that he really doesn’t want that asshole out in the world any longer than necessary. 

He opens the door and steps out into the hallway. He almost laughs at the sight. Almost. 

Most of the Avengers (plus Strange) are gathered in the hall, most of them are sitting in the uncomfortable, plastic chairs but a few of them (namely: Steve Rogers, Strange, and Wanda Maximoff) are standing. They all look up once they hear the click of the door closing and latching behind Tony. Steve straightens up and begins to walk towards him. Tony feels protectiveness, and a little bit of annoyance, swirl and heat in his stomach and chest. He wants to push them all away and tell them to fuck off. But he doesn’t. He stands his ground in front of the door to Peter’s room and crosses his arms. The others must sense Tony’s unease and they all settle down, back in their places. Steve stops an awkward distance away.

“How is he?” Steve asks. Tony wants to retort something like ‘as if you really care about the kid, Rogers.’ or something equally as insulting but realizes that it won’t help the situation. They are all here because they care for the kid on some level, whether that means they’re here for Tony or him.

“He’s better,” Tony can practically feel the tension in the room soften. “He hasn’t woken up yet but I need some hands down in my lab. Nat, Rhodes, if you wouldn’t mind?” He asks. Natasha stands from where she’s sitting and brushes her bleach blonde hair out of her face. Rhodey does the same and they follow him to the lab. 

“What do you need us to do, Tony.” Natasha asks as soon as the doors to the lab close. She has her arms crossed over her chest and her brows are furrowed. Rhodey is sitting in one of the barstool chairs by a workbench and nods at Tony.

“May brought it to my attention that the person who stabbed Peter might still be out in the world, wandering around ready to stab yet another self-sacrificing, too good for this world, baby faced webslinger.” Rhodey raises an eyebrow at Tony’s phrasing. Natasha stares on, impassively. “I want your guys help in finding ‘em.” 

“Okay, sure. But why us? Why not, I don’t know, Clint. He’s the best a hacking.” Natasha asks, not sounding like she was intentionally trying to pry, but it felt that way to Tony. He sighed.

“Out of everyone in the Avengers right now, you two are the only people I trust with something like this.” Both of their faces soften at the truth of it all. “I’m still getting used to having Cap and Co. back, and ‘Tasha I know you sided with Steve, but I still trust you. Fact of the matter is, I still don’t trust anyone waiting outside Peter’s room as much as you guys.” They both nod.

“What do you need us to do?” Rhodey asks. They get down to business.

“Okay, so I’m gonna setup Baby Monitor footage and you guys can watch it back, see who it is, track them down and get them locked up for whatever they were doing.” Tony tells them. “I’m going to go wait back with Peter until you guys get ready to go. I wanna meet this crap sack.” He finishes. They nod again, a little grim this time, and they set to work, walking around each other and working together.

Once everything is setup, he leaves telling them to alert him if they find anything interesting and when they’re about to leave. Tony is by Peter’s bedside within the next couple of minutes. 

It can’t have been 30 minutes later when there's a knock on the door. May is asleep, still holding onto her unconscious nephews hand so Tony gets up from his vigil to open the door. It’s Rhodey and he has news. They walk back down to the lab, but not before Tony leaves Bruce and Strange in charge of keeping watch over the small family. Bruce is happy to check up on Peter again, citing it was time for a checkup anyway and Strange didn’t protest. He was fine with doing whatever Tony needed him to in this stressful time. 

“You got a name yet?” Tony asks once they enter the lab. Rhodey points to the screen that currently has credentials of an average looking, middle aged man on it.

“Jason Riley. He’s been arrested a few times, but he’s always been bailed out. Mostly petty crimes and alcohol abuse. He’s 46 and divorced. Wife and kid left him after he got a bit too violent one time after one too many drinks. He’s smart though, someone you would’ve hired for SI if he wasn’t a criminal.” Rhodey says. 

“Mm, I dunno, I know the Myth Busters and they’re as close to criminals as one can be without being arrested and I’ve still worked with them.” Natasha gives Tony a look, who just shrugs in response. “So, what was so interesting for our friendly neighborhood Spider-Man to have to intervene? What was Riley up to?” 

“Robbery and attempted rape of one Layla Evans, 22 and just moved out here from Washington, DC.” Natasha says in deadpan from behind Tony. His eyebrows raise so high, they almost vanish into his hairline. “We assumed the attempted rape part. We couldn’t think of why else he would have a knife other than to either murder her or threaten her into doing something she didn’t want. And murder didn’t seem like his style so we went with the latter.” She explained. 

“You would know what his ‘style’ is, wouldn’t you?” Tony tries to joke. 

“Yes.” She deadpans again.

“Oooo-kay, remind me to never get on your bad side.” Tony says wearily. “Can I watch the footage?” 

“You’re not gonna like it, Tony.” Natasha says. Tony pushes anyway.

“This is my kid, my suit, my lab, I get to watch it.” Tony says defiantly. Rhodey and Natasha make brief eye contact and Rhodey sighs in exasperation before going to a different tab and pressing play on a video footage called ‘Baby Monitor: 6/12/18’. 

Tony watches as Peter disarms Riley then goes to help the girl. While his guard is down, he gets a knife to the side and Tony’s blood absolutely boils. He was just a kid trying to do his part to help the world. And what does he get for it? A fucking knife in his side.

“What do you want us to do about this, Tones?” Rhodey asks, his voice is soft and uncertain. Tony sighs again. He’s been doing that a lot lately. 

“Rhodey, I want you to stay here as backup. To me and Nat or to Strange and Bruce. Nat, you’ll come with me. I figure two bulking Iron Man suits won’t be a subtle as one and a super spy.” Tony says. Rhodey looks like he wants to protest but allows Tony to make the plans. 

Rhodey sits down in a swivel chair and gets to work on combing through facial recognition. Natasha and Tony suit up, the whole time, all Tony can think about is what will he do when they find this bastard? Will he freak out and Natasha would have to hold him back? Will he be calm enough to call the authorities? 

As they get on the jet, he thinks he maybe should have just stayed with Peter. He would be able to keep them safe, better than anyone here (and that was definitely not the truth. He was emotionally compromised in just about every way, he might even be a danger to Peter right now. But fuck it all if he didn’t want to be with his kid while said kid was hurt) and he would be able to keep an eye on him. 

Rhodey comms in when they’re halfway out to Queens. “Guys, I’ve got a permanent residence on Riley.” He says. Tony stiffens.

“Where?” Tony barks into the comm. Rhodey rambles off an address in Hell's Kitchen and Natasha sets the coordinates into the jet. “Hey, check on the kid for me, would you?” He asks. It’s been bothering him more than he’d care to admit that he can’t just go to check up on him every five seconds.

But now? Now it’s time to play the waiting game.

——————————————————————

xiii.)

It’s official, Tony hates this plan. 

So the plan is Natasha breaks into the guys apartment, spooks Riley a little, and then leaves.

And where does Tony play in all this? He’s the backup. Not even the backup either because Rhodey’s backup. So he’s like, backup-backup. And this isn’t fair because this is his kid. He should be the one storming in there, guns blazing and blasting that guy into next month. He knows Natasha will do an amazing job, like normal (and no one will get hurt… hopefully. Natasha’s a wild card sometimes so you never know) but since he’s sorta kinda maybe the kids father figure, he feels like he should be the one protecting him primarily. And to Tony, that means shoving this guys foot so far up his own ass, he won’t be able to walk again. 

But the sooner he gets home to Peter the better, he supposes. 

Tony scans the building for Riley and upon not finding him there, Natasha sneaks in through an unlocked window. Tony wanted to see every moment of this so he tagged a tracker/camera on the collar of her jumpsuit and set up the feed to play in his suit and on the screen in the quinjet.

When the footage first flickers on, Natasha is just getting inside. There’s a time stamp in the bottom left corner says 5:21PM and only then how late (or early, depending on who you’re talking to) it’s gotten. The first thing they see is a dingy looking bathroom that has water leak stains on the ceiling and cracks on the dirty floor below Natasha’s feet. The shower curtain rod is crooked and the curtain is an awful shade of baby blue that clashes with everything else in the bathroom.

Natasha makes her way out of the bathroom and it leads into the conjoined kitchen/living room area. It’s arguably worse in here than in the bathroom, which is saying quite a bit. The wallpaper is peeling off the walls and Tony can imagine the how stale the air must be. The kitchen looks pretty normal considering it looks untouched, like it’s never been used before. But the living room is something else entirely.

There’s trash and takeout littered all over the ground and the carpet looks worn and it makes an odd noise when she walks on it. Like when you take cornstarch and squeeze it into your hand. There's a green, ratty looking sofa that Tony can basically smell by just looking at it. By the small window on the other side of the living room, there’s an old, cloth covered rocking chair and across from that is an ancient box TV. Don’t get Tony wrong, he knows rent is expensive anywhere in New York, but this shouldn’t even be allowed to be considered a home. 

Natasha goes to sit stealthily on the windowsill. 

It’s around 5:50 in the morning when Jason Riley stumbles into the building and it takes every fiber of Tony’s being not to head in there and beat the shit out of him. 

“Nat, Riley is in the building with you.” Tony says into the comm. She visibly stiffens and you can tell even from the first POV camera. There’s loud footfalls coming from outside the front door of the apartment, cursing and then a fumbling of keys on the front door. It swings open and the man comes inside and closes the door without noticing Natasha. He flicks on the uncovered ceiling light and the bulb flickers. Riley turns around and stops dead in his tracks when he sees her. Tony wants to laugh. He seems to get his bearings and his shock morphs into anger.

“What the hell are you doing in my apartment?” He seethes. Natasha stands up slowly. He’s about to shout something at her but then he recognises her. “Oh, my god. You’re the black Widow.” Tony can practically see her smirk.

“Guilty as charged.” She says. He looks nervous, as he should be. “I hear you got fired recently.” She begins. It was true. Last minute info Rhodey had told them after Natasha settled in. He nods nervously.

“Y-yeah. But why are you here?” His voice shakes a little. 

 

“Well, we found out something… interesting about you.” She says slowly and Tony can tell she’s prolonging this. She’s enjoying it. The kid really did have everyone wrapped around his finger. He stays silent and waits for her to continue. “Our friendly, neighborhood Spider-Man called in earlier tonight,” recognition flashes across his face and something else too. Fear maybe. “He had a stab wound in his side and was bleeding out. But here’s the interesting part. That was you and your knife, wasn’t it?” She asks rhetorically. He stutters but ultimately shuts up. “We looked into the rest of your files, too.” She keeps going and Riley makes an indignant sound in the back of his throat like he wants to say something but at the glare Natasha (probably) levels him with, he snaps his mouth shut so tight, there's an audible ‘click’ of teeth. “You should be in jail right now, Mr. Riley. So we were going to call the police.” All color drains out of his face. “But, we decided to be nice and give you options instead. Number one is that we can call the police and you’ll be put in jail for who knows how long. Or,” She pauses for dramatic effect and Tony has never appreciated her more than right now because the guy looks petrified. “You can change your name and move as far away from New York as you can.” 

It’s clear that Riley didn’t know what to think. “Are you kidding?” He asks and he sounds mad now. Tony knows Natasha can handle herself but he thought Peter could handle himself, too, and he almost bled to death because of this guy. “All because I hurt some wannabe superhero?” Tony never really understood the phrase “seeing red” until now. Natasha steps in.

“Watch it,” She says taking a small step forward and he takes one back so his back is against the door. “Don’t forget that you put him in the hospital. And, I guess if you don’t like either of these deals, we can figure something else out. But I promise it wouldn’t be nearly as pleasant as either of these. Tony Stark is pretty torn up over this.” She says and her tone deepens in such a threatening way, Steve Rogers might even take a step back. Tony won’t argue later with the comment about him because it’s the truth. It was a little bruising to the ego but what was that when his kid almost died because of this bastard? 

Riley pretends to contemplate for a minute before answering. “I’ll take the second deal.”

“Great. You should be packed up by the end of today.” He gapes at her and steps forward to argue but she steps forward some and his back is on the door again. “It doesn’t matter where you go, so long as you’re gone by midnight. We’ll know if you’re not and there’ll be… consequences.” She says ominously. The ‘consequences’ is just Tony calling the police on this guy. The only reason they were even giving him options is because this meant they would know for sure he wouldn’t come back. New York is Avengers territory and they know just about everything happening here, whether that be from experience or a spider-themed hero reporting to them. 

“Alright, that will be all Mr. Riley. Do you have any questions about the contract?” She asks politely. He shakes his head. “I’ll be on my way, then.” She walks towards the front door. He doesn’t move. “Excuse me.” She says and she’s back to that deep, threatening voice. He moves out of the way with question written all over his face. “What?” Natasha asks. “I’m not an animal, I know how to use doors.” She says as she closes the door and walks out of the building and back onto the quinjet.

“You ready to go?” She asks as she gets into the pilot seat. Tony nods.

“Thank you, for that. You didn’t have to that, but I really appreciate it.” Tony says honestly. He doesn’t know where he (or the team) would be without her.

“This might come as a shock to you Tony, but you aren’t the only one who cares about Peter. But it wasn’t problem.” She says turning around to look him in the eyes with a soft smile on her face. Tony nods back and they fly back to the Compound.

——————————————————————

xiv.)

Peter wakes up a few days later and Tony is sitting next to him and tapping away on a Stark phone. He’s a little disappointed that May isn’t there but he’s sure there’s a good reason. 

“Mr. St’rk?” His voice croaks and Tony looks up quickly and picks up a glass full of water and a bendy straw and helps him take a sip. He tries to sit up and pain filters though him. He gasps loudly. Tony gently pushes him back down. 

“Are you in any pain?” Tony asks as he sets the glass down. Peter shakes his head. “What do you remember? Do you know what day it is?” Tony asks. 

“Wednesday?” Asks hesitantly. “I’m not sure. Last thing I remember is… getting stabbed? It felt more like a punch though?” 

“Nope, unfortunately for you, you were actually stabbed.” Tony goes for a flippant tone while leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms but he’s not sure how well it works out. “And it’s also Saturday.” Peter gapes at him and Tony has to stop the overly fond feeling in his stomach from fluttering up from his stomach and into his chest. “Don’t worry, kiddo. It’s completely normal for you to need that much sleep. After a traumatic incident, that is. But you should still be getting eight to ten hours of sleep each-” Peter cuts him off.

“Hold on just one second,” He says holding up his index finger on one hand and pinching the bridge of his nose with the other. “First, what’s the school situation like? And second, where’s May?” 

“What, I’m not good enough for you?” Tony asks in a teasing tone. Peter glares at him. “Alright, tough crowd. I see how it is. She got called into work. Oh, and Hap called Ned and he said he would pick up work for you while you were out. He dropped them off with Happy on Friday afternoon. He seemed pretty worried, you should call him when you feel up to it. But now you can do homework while you’re bedridden.” He says. 

“Bedridden? I’m fine, what’s the big deal?” Peter asks and Tony swears that he’s going to kill this kid if someone doesn’t do it for him. Then he shoves that thought to the back of his mind because he almost did loose the kid. He amends to be extra nice to him for as long as he was awake today.

“The big deals is that you got stabbed, had two seizures, and suffered from blood loss.” Tony deadpans while adjusting Peter’s sheets so they were covering him more fully. 

“Oh.” Peter says numbly, staring off into space. 

“‘Oh’ is right, kid.” Tony sighs, feeling more exasperated than he has in a long time and massages his forehead in a half-assed attempt to keep away the oncoming headache. “You just gotta be more careful, squirt. I’m not always going to be there to protect you. The team and I… we’re worried about you, constantly if I may add. The best thing you could do for their peace of mind - for my peace of mind - is just lay low for a couple of days at least while you heal. You don’t need to go out there and be perfect. You’re allowed to make mistakes, we expect that, we all most certainly did when we first started. But you have something we didn’t have. Help. And you have a whole team of superheroes behind you if you ever need any help at all. Me too, and you know that but you need to use it, okay?” Peter nods and looks a little sheepish. He scratches the back of his neck and looks down at his lap. 

“Sorry, Mr. Stark. I’ll do better.” 

“Damn straight you will. You’ll be better than all of us, that’s for sure. You already are. And no more apologies.” Tony says but there’s a soft smile on his face. “For now however, lean on us. Let us take some of the pressure. You don’t need to do it by yourself.” 

“Thank you, Tony.”

“No problem, spiderbaby.”

Maybe old Peter is gone and new Peter is here to stay, but Tony is oldly fine with that, Tony thinks as he watches Peter fall back asleep, eyes drooping not unlike a puppy. They’re both his baby faced, kind hearted, helpful, amazing, stupid kid. And that was okay. Peter Parker had Tony Stark in his corner. And Tony Stark would protect him until he couldn’t and even after that. 

——————————————————————

**Author's Note:**

> I definitely wasn't expecting this to be as long as it was, maybe like an 8K and this is definitely over 15K. I was originally going to end it after vii but I felt like it wasn't complete yet so I kept going and it just snowballed from there. webMD was my best friend during the end of this fic, if I'm being completely honest. The title felt appropriate because in this fic, Peter is struggling to find himself again and Tony, May, and the rest of the Avengers catch glimpses of the “Old Peter”. I dunno, I thought it was appropriate. I suggest you go listen to the song if you haven’t already heard it. Tell me what you thought in the comments and leave a kudos! 
> 
> \- chaoticlywize (word count: 15346)


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